Tuesday, February 14, 2012

...Battleworld (naturally), recording woes, a promise to keep.

New Featured Link - Double Feature With E-Celebrities!!

Y'know, I rarely pander to some of the "bigger E-Celebrities," because I don't want to portray myself as a fuckin' bottom-feeding hanger-on, like those weird little fish things that hang to shark fins and eat the cast-offs, or the long trail of crap that hangs from a carp's butt.

I don't wanna be that, man. BUT, some of my commentators, critiques, and best replies always seem to be from these mega-blogs whether that title is reflected by the excellence in their content or sheer number of followers.

Normally I focus only one one blog at a time with this section, but due to a recent mega-critique which I haven't responded to yet but instead immediately began acting on with his advice in mind. In this case I"m talkin' about the LOLSORANDOM yet always so fuckin' cool Bonafide Jones. Hell, even his name sounds like a blaxploitation hero's. I half-expected some Barry Gordy's The Last Dragon action the first time I saw him comment at someone else's blog. Seriously, the brotha's got insight in Internets and knows the material he puts out, mostly funny images and the commentary that should go with them.

I mean, hell - you KNOW it's good if it makes yer boy, ThatBastard, laugh out loud and nearly spit out his coffee in a fine mist. The brotha knows his shit, yo.

Another mega-critiquer at my various blogs are the comic duo over at A Beer For The Shower. Words cannot describe how I look up to these two bastards as an artist of the written word, and despite their legion of followers they seem to always have a word or two for meh. I know they try to do this with as many as they can, but the fact that they read my tripe is like a huge SciFi neckbeard's fanfiction being followed and liked by George Takei, y'know? On the one hand, it's fanfiction written by a huge SciFi neckbeard. On the other hand, IT'S GEORGE TAKEI GODOMMOT FRONK HOW COOL IS THAT MOTHERFUCKER?

They may not be as big as George Takei (nor as homosexual, though their bromosexuality is endearing to read about. Every Jay should have a Silent Bob, yo.) when it comes to celebrity, but their e-fame and girth cannot be denied.

So for you three gents, this Featured Links Double Feature is for you!!!!

Go read Bonafide Jones and revel in his new domain name WHICH I AM FUCKING SUPERNOVA JELLY OVER:


And go read the fraternal non-related twins of Bryan and Brandon over at:


Tell 'em ThatBastard sent ya for 25% extra sassy blackness from you following them. Especially from Bryan and Brandon who are, supposedly, white.

Recording Woes

So, some of you DON'T KNOW the harrowing tale of Anubis Unit, my main band. Some of you e-detectives (all one of ya) already were able find my old DeviantArt where I posted links for both AU and No Rhymes simply because I re-uploaded those lyrics here at Blogspot, not to mention actually naming the No Rhymes concept.

Suffice it to say, Anubis Unit's tale of woe started two, damn near three years ago when I and my drummer first met while working together in a deep freezer packaging room of a certain company. I'm something of, y'know, DA PARTY when I'm workin' I do all kinds of stuff to pass the time while going through a 12-hour worknight. At nights, you GOTTA rock or shit will suck quickly.

I, as always, began to sing or hum certain tracks and quickly he'd join in on backup and drumming on whatever was closest, one time my friggin' shoulders. We quickly discerned that, musically, we meshed incredibly well with our timing and everything, so he invited me over to a jam and I slowly began to descend down that slippery slope to become a real musician and vocalist. Not that I can claim such a lofty title (seriously, you'll find me hard-pressed to ever admit that aloud), but hey - it's his fault.

THEEEEEN the violent incident with my left knee happened. Out of hurt pride I kinda cut contacts with just about everyone who knew me and buried my head into Faecbawks games for about a year or so. I also stopped singing and stopped being creative.

After six months of being in a knee immobilizer, surgery, seven months of professional physical therapy and seven more months of therapy on my own and after regaining the ability to walk again I approached my homeboy about forming Anubis Unit after all.

One year later we've gone through two guitarists, lost two or three practice areas, damn near lost his expensive drum kit and P.A. system and two "meh" stage attempts. We've had to work without a bassist for that year, and every single time we went to record it either came out sounding bad, someone was sick, or something bad happened.

We've gone two or three months twice now without practice and undergoing the stress of not knowing whether or not we're even in a band still.

THEN THIS RECENT RECORDING EVENT TOOK PLACE. Some of you know either by talking to me over the phone, in Shittychat, or just by how I type here at Blogspot that it's been Hell on wheels. Seriously, shall we recount the ways this strange entity has attempted to destroy or stop us?

Let's ignore the desperate attempt to stall us out by a week, then a day, then an hour. On the DAY OF recording:

-There was that hour mix-up.
-The guest guitarist got sick so we couldn't get Shame You, our only other "has more lyrics than one word repeated over and over again" song.
-The bassist couldn't show up.
-The backup bassist couldn't show up due to an emergency.
-OUR TERTIARY BASSIST SHOWED UP, but he only had one warm-up run in order to hear the songs and then do his thing.
-Two months of no practice. You think on that then listen to our stuff. You hear how good that timing is? Fuck yeah, Anubis Unit boyee.
-The drummer is incredibly sick, but we were able to pump him full of my sport mega man vitamins and a chest congestion pill, as well as tea and beer. He gets his pep back for the recording at least, and was even able to add an on-the-fly drumroll that sounds AMAZING.
-A fuse blew in my car and I didn't even realize it. I had been driving all day without dashboard light or tail lights.
-We're half an hour to forty minutes late starting simply because me and the guitarist didn't quite know where the studio was - the drummer and the studio owner were already inside and had to come out and dial in the number to open the gate. Lol.
-We're rushed, haven't practiced in two months and have to re-feel our timing with one another with only one warm-up run.
-The ice cream bars I bought from Grocery Outlet melted. Fuck you, that's important.
-Fuck Valentine's Day. Everyone's celebrating early except for us.

There was a couple of other things, but with EACH ISSUE THAT CAME UP, we had to shoot 'em down. I've come to the realization by now that we've actually had it easy when compared to other bands who don't even get to this point, but still man - all this and more on recording day.

Fuck everything.

BUT, it went down, we now have four songs out there in the ether of the Internuggets, and we'll be recording and gigging more every sunday or whateverhaveyou.

So long as we keep workin' hard at it, burning that midnight oil and what-not, this shit will go down good.

Now that we've HAD the recording done, we can now focus on our next step: the company (whose name will remain anonymous) who wanted to hear those recordings have, as of today, stated that they wish to hear more from us. Mostly the un-vulgar stuff, but we've already got that outta our system, y'know? I'll be singing a capella for the rest of the songs, postin' 'em up on the Anubis Unit youtube and we'll be using THOSE as a guide (with the possibility of my drummer using a drum track for those as well) and as a presentation to the marketing side of the music biz.

Suffice it to say, we'll be gigging as well as practicing so we can present more songs to the masses. I'll also be all upon the Anubis Unit blog soon, not to mention KAOS: Chaos Party Radio.

And then there's the Scream/Dreams project.

OH, above all the Battleworld project, which I'd like Anubis Unit/No Rhymes to do the music for.

...I'm certain I forgot something somewhere. OH YEAH, I'm also redesigning my blogs, possibly even culling one or two and combining them. Hell, if I can figure out a way to combine all of them into one site, I will.

Go ahead and guess which domain name I'll go with~! :D

Someday, something I do will actually sell and make me feel like all my wasted youth will have been spent for a worthwhile cause. We'll see.

A Big Thank You To...Well, You!

Y'know, I've gotta admit something to y'all. Today's Valentine's Day, and while I haven't been the best blogger (newb interface, pre-made website designs, I keep throwing stuff at you guys despite how hard it is for some of you to keep up with my stuff, plus that one three month disappearance act I pulled), some of you have stuck with me through thick and thin, offering honest to goodness critiques as well as (well, I think) well-deserved pats on my back for a post well done.

Today I'll be working on the projects and spending Valentine's Day at Shittychat, domming hot traps and cybering with everything that moves. Here at Blogspot though, I'll just be leaving this small post thanking the people who have at least appeared to believe in me and what I'm doin', y'know?

I don't need suck-ups, I just need people who can honestly answer my questions and point out where I need more work. It's to you guys, my commenting crew, the readers who hit me back when I read them as well...all y'all.

Hell, if you haven't been in my Featured Links department, you'll get there eventually.

Suffice it to say, it's to YOU bastards that I say: Happy Valentine's Day, and my most heartfelt, semi-teary-eyed thanks.

Can you feel that? I'm e-hugging all of you.

Without pelvis thrusting.

For once.

...okay, I stopped e-hugging you and I have once again gone back to pelvis-thrusting in your general direction.

As hard as I can.

Unf unf unf.

And now, for a promise to keep I made awhile back to all of you...

Ahem, ahem, ahem. It's not as if it'll change anything, ThatBastard is only a name to my only personality. The way I act in Shittychat, all across the internet, and in real life are all the same guy. Me.

But I DID have a somewhat established e-name before ThatBastard, and it's the same name I use in Anubis Unit. At least, in my little world of the internets I went by this particular name, and though I ain't no e-celebrity I DID have my own little group of people that I'd hang out with on the internuggets and just have fun with. Hell, maybe you knew of one of 'em, I dunno.

Well, at least without the full title, but yeah...anyway, ahem.

I swore that when we got our recording done, I'd reveal the "real" guy behind ThatBastard, who's the same guy with a different name.

So may I bow slightly at the waist with a flourish of the arm and present myself to you?

The name's J.


The FULL title in Anubis Unit is JDW: CONQUEROR OF HELL AND PRELATE OF HEAVEN, but most of that title has yet to be earned, y'know?

So. There. Promise kept. Now I'll go back to being That Bastard From Bellingham, thank you...I actually like that name, and will keep it for as long as I'm here in the blogosphere, y'knowwhatImean?

Now let's start confusing new people visiting my blogs by switching between the two names in the comment sections! LOLOLOL WHAT TROLLS WE BE~!!!

General Adverts and wrapping things up here

So yeah, I'll be either culling, combining, or somehow figuring out a way to get all six of my blogs in one place. Not to mention a general re-design that'll be more intuitive to my writing style. We shall see.

As is, I have to make sure I'm not actually IN Shittychat, my homeboy's chat room, whenever I am doing work. Otherwise I find myself gravitating back to the chat room, acting a fool and being creatively useless (at least towards my projects).

And yeaaaaaah, that's not good.

Plus I'm emoting more ever since going there. Blah. http://www.shittychat.com/register.php

Did I mention I wrote the FAQ's and rules? Also a tips and tricks screen that hasn't been edited yet. Spad, the owner, pissed in it - I mean, edited it further without really taking ANY content out and just posted it up with mega-credits to me. :D Go check it out, it's awesome. In the very least, you'll find the rules and FAQ's funny, if applicable.

Hmmm. One thing I can definitely do is steamroll Man-Flavored Milk into Sooth(e) Your Freaking Beast, but everything else I'm havin' trouble. Might set it up as an archive thing, like The Bellingham Jerk (which I really don't have the money for - it costs money to eat out!), just keep 'em around for posterity....we'll see.

Last but not least, go to Youtube, search "Anubis Unit," fave and like and comment and subscribe. We need views more than we need money right now, and it HUUUUUURTS to say that~! But, more views and spreadin' around the videos = love to us, and gives my band more of an impetus to post original content. Love from our peoples = energy, dontcha know.

OH, and as a last note even though I've got the starting values and design notes for two outta five kingdoms, I DO have more behind-the-scenes stuff written up already for Extreme Existence: Battleworld, so if you're an artist, programmer, a sprite artist or just a hobbyist like me hit a brotha up and let's see what we can do. Like I've stated before, I'm coming at this from the viewpoint of a writer, but I'm doing the starting values and some of the equations necessary to calculate the core of the gameplay: the combat system.

Anyway, this is only tentative - I probably won't really need any major help until I personally go facefirst into the brick wall of programming. Hell, I was going to use a hex map creator to set up the battlefield and use ascii characters to represent the units and named characters. I'm probably already waving around my flag of ignorance, but that's how I'll go about it after I'm done writing up the specifics and starting values of the five kingdoms involved.

Maybe I'm going about this all wrong? Hey, I'm always open to critiques and fandom. Just don't be fan-DUMB. LOLOLOL DID U C WUT I DID THURR?

lol, fan dumb....


~That Bastard From Bellingham. Yer homeboy, J.


  1. Sub Pop. Wow, thank you for the complement that makes me feel good and honestly humbled. But, I promise I'm no bigger deal than you are. Listening to your recording woes gives me all kinds of warm fuzzies, it's sweet, but it also frustrates me a little because I know none of that would be a problem if I was involved. Anyway, I can't wait to hear the results and will most def be checking you out on youtube. I checked out shitty chat, and the rules and faq lol, and it seemed to be a quality operation. I hope the Lucky Star marathon is still going on. Oh and what are the sprites for?

    1. Ideally, it'd be a sprite-based game like Fire Emblem, Tactics Ogre and the like. Realistically, I'll use a crappy ascii scheme like Dorf Fortress or somethin'.

      And need I point out how turned on I am now that you've mentioned you might be a recording studio person yourself?

      I don't suck a dick to get ahead, but I'm a mean cuddler. I'm on the outside of the spoon. And the top bunk is mine, bitch.

      It just dawned on me who you might be in the chat, and it's pretty fuckin' obvious if it is you. I'll be hittin' the "you" I think is you up later.

      Lol Lucky Star, I didn't even watch it that day.

      And dude, to me yer a mega-blog just from the sheer funny content. Hey, if it's true, I'm probably there thrusting my pelvis at it.

      My swizzle is properly complemented by my swivel hips.

  2. JDW, I will do a bit of whoring for you and some art(I warn you nothing I plan comes out looking like anything but random abstraction). I'll see you on shitty sometime.


      Just check out the design notes and draw whatever you want. Hell, if ANY of my projects strikes you as being a worthwhile venture for fanarts/official stuff or some other contribution, go for it. I'm only one brotha (technically two) and this past week feels like I've been in a boggy marsh and Atreyu keeps pulling at my tethers in order to keep me out of depression.

      Go ahead and try not to cry now that you're thinking of THAT scene!

  3. I tagged you!! Here's the link.If you don't do it your dick will fall off. (I'm sure you can have it re-attached surgically, but that shit's expensive)


      I already e-beat you down for that, so yeah. Even though I said I wouldn't do these damn tags, for YOU I will. Besides, looks like fun. ;3

      Just gotta get TO it though, but I promise it'll be on my next That Bastard On. :D

  4. Yeah, those guys at A Beer For The Shower are getting all kinds of recognition these days and they deserve it. It's one of my favorites, too.

    1. Indeed, indeed!

      ...say, is that Carl Sagan in your avatar? <_<