Monday, September 3, 2012

...on keepin' up, on gettin' back, on bein' here~!

Featured Link

Ohhhhh baby, things have just been busy, haven't they?  Well, let's get started by introducing a new Featured Link, eh?  Well, y'know where I go for some seriously high-falutin', awesome movies in a cinemablog?

No, not Beasts In Human Skin, I already covered that low-browed blog full of blood, babes, and totally rawkin' bewbage.  No, I'm talkin' about his polar opposite in which-brow-is-which cinematography.  Besides, Banacek covers grindhouse and exploitation films.

No, I'm talkin' about the man and blog who put me onto Ingmar Bergman's "Persona," a wonderful movie you can find on Netflix nonetheless!  I'm talkin' about the man who digs David Lynch  movies and the occasional "stupid humor" movie.

I'm talkn' about the Film Geek Bastard over at "A Girl And A Gun: A Cinematic Blog."

No, seriously, there's a reason why whenever I'm in the mood for some serious cinematic and historical relevance, I come to THIS guy!  With an ongoing list of the truly "great" movies and their relevance to cinema history, not to mention a covering of his favorite movies out there (I STILL gotta see Blue Velvet and Lost Highway!  DAMN YOU NETFLIIIIIX!), ol' F.G. does a great job postin' up the kinda stuff you want to watch when you want to pull out your film geek card at a casual dining experience.

"Well, you COULD say Lost Highway was a metaphor for a man going through Purgatory towards Hell, but you've obviously never seen Sleepless in Seattle!"

Hey, fuck you, Sleepless in Seattle sucked.  If you want to watch a real Billy Crystal movie, go watch Forget Paris or City Slickers.

Even City Slickers II: Legend of Curly.

A Girl And A Gun: A Cinematic Blog

Tell 'im That Bastard sent you and you'll probably get 36% more of...well, nothing.  I'd be surprised if the guy even remembers me, I've been on and off the blog scene so many times. >XD

Recent Writing Stuff

I really should be talking about the work I'm doing on Taboo 2, which shortly after I'll start seeking in earnest for an agent and a publisher.  More query letters time (I only got, like, two responses back from the initial three I sent...both negative, but still filled me with optimism!), but at least I'll have a larger package to show off rather than just the two novellas and the poetry (hurr hurr hurr, larger package).  Altogether, I've posted some new stuff over at The Pen Is My Sword and if you haven't read it...well, you're a jerk.  Go read it.  It's good. <3

In the meantime, you wanna see how I start off the ideas for scripts/lyrics/literature?  Check this out, fresh out of my head in a recent 3 a.m. foray at work, shared with like five other people who thought it was an amazingly awesome B-rated idea.

Prepare to love me, and realize I have two other movie ideas featuring ninjas that are pretty much like this.


Boltcutters Versus Chainsaw: The Movie

An alien organism takes over a small city/town, turning the people into chaotic, violent, cannibalistic nightmares.  Basically turns it into a lawless town that lives to cause havoc and war on other cities.  As the disease spreads, many do the damndest just not to get caught.

Their leader is a man who calls himself Jagi Zero One, a man invulnerable to bullets and wields a massive chainsaw that can split cars in half with a single swipe, supposedly made from the bones of the aliens' previous body itself.

Enter a traveling Winnebago and a seemingly homeless man, dressed in rags and coats, who reveals himself to be an intergalactic bounty hunter (Noman A. Tall, a.k.a. - DARZURB the Bounty Hunter) who came after the alien criminal who crash-landed on this planet.  Armed with powerful martial arts and a gizmo-laden pair of bolt cutters, he savages his way through the entire city, defeating each mini-boss and diving further past the barricades until the epic, climactic battle between himself and his ultimate goal: Jagi.

In a no holds-barred drag-out, knuckles-bared, balls-to-the-wall slobberknocker will the fate of the world be decided as Jagi unleashes his chainsaw against Noman's bolt cutters!

"I've seen all your tricks, Jagi, and I want to finally reveal my best one to you.  You see, I don't have one bolt cutter...I have had TWO this entire time!!!!"

"My name?  My name is Noman.  Noman A. Tall." >chuckles<
"Why are you laughing?"
"No..uh, no reason.  Why?  Why are YOU laughing?"

(a.k.a. Hobo With A Shotgun versus Fist Of The North Star versus Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome versus Escape from Whatever/LA/New York)


Now by the time I've gotten around to actually writing this up, I'd've come up with waaaaay better backstory, some more interesting side characters for DARZURB (yes, all caps all the time) to run across and interact with, actually plotting out the gadgetry and mechanical bullshit for his bolt cutters, and (naturally) the combat scenes that comprise the majority of this movie/series/whatever.

And THAT is the little peek inside my brain, how most of my bullshit starts. :D  Admittedly this is waaaay bare bones, but you get the picture - usually I'll have a skeletal structure that is major scene by scene/chapter by chapter and actually plot out what I'm going to do, but I've got more than a few ideas that start off just like this.  Plus this is a B-rated action movie idea.

Sometimes, you NEED it to be intentionally bad and grindhouse-y.  Blood, boobs, and beatdowns aplenty.  Plus you never realize how awesome a tool a pair of bolt cutters are until you hold onto a pair that are larger than your arms, slung against your shoulder and you start making special attacks with 'em.

If you dug this, I might post up the other two B-rated movie snipped ideas I had over at Pen, but I figured meh, why not post 'em here first?  We'll see.  Lemme know what ya think~!

Roll Call!

Some of my regular readers may not know I'm back.  Let's try something different - in the comment section proclaim that you are here and if you are willing to spread the gospel that is my bullshit!  Think you can pass me around on the Faecbawks and Twitter scene like a gangster lean?

I'd be ever so grateful if you did!

Rage of Bahamut and Abusing My Twitter Feed

So yeah, I think I've already explained why I abuse both my Twitter and my Faecbawks for free cards and riches on Rage of Bahamut.  I mean, why not so long as the offer is still there, right?

Well, now the good people of Cygames/Mobage have instituted an absolute ban on all trading until...well, they haven't actually TOLD us when.  So yeah, I'm lookin' pretty hard at the whole tweeting every day thing and even if it IS automatically generated, I realize I'm kinda annoyed at them for this whole trading issue.  I mean, trading (and the Marketplace over at the unofficial forums) are a kinda metagame for me, one that's actually getting me interested in Poker and the stock market again.

So yeah, I'm kinda them for taking away such a vital piece of the game, even if it's for a limited time, and without notification of when we're gonna get it back at that.

No, what do they do?  A log-in bonus stamp game that will reward everyone with an upgraded version of Angel Queen and a practically useless Secret Rare that will probably be worth only 1 holy powder (the common trading currency) since EVERYONE will have one.

Yet despite all this I became the leader of an Order, established the wikipedia and forums for 'em, and all seems to have gone smooth with the merger of another Order to create: Grim Rock.

Fun times, fun times..I'd invite you guys, 'cept we're all completely full.  Like I had to butcher inactives and still we needed one person to leave just so we can ensure a single slot is open for just in case measures.

Still, if you fancy playin' I've written a few articles that might make it a bit easier on ya in what you decide to do with the game, and there's plenty of material already at the unofficial forums on gettn' started, what all three realms are like currently, and other fun tidbits.

And naturally I wrote up a parody guide on how to deal with the Marketplace and the cutthroats and scammers that infest the woodwork.

No, seriously, if you can learn how to get around them and the "lowballers," the Marketplace is a fun metagame of sorts, with plenty of trading going down all around the clock.

...normally.  ::sighs::

Party Like A Rock Star

So a friend and photographer of mine, Jazz of Tilted Canvas Productions (, just had her birthday recently and guess who got invited to go bar crawlin' and club hoppin'?

Yeap.  Yers truly, alongside the lovely and talented Vorel Kethend of Modeling In The Rain ( and my co-model for several shoots.  Suffice it to say shit was aaaaawesome, and Vee actually covers it in somewhat detail (and with more pictures!) over at her blog.  G'wan over and say helloo, check it out, and see how we do what we do where we at.

Or somethin' like that, lol. to see some of the pictures. :D

Work, work, work and the daily grind

Despite the recent clubbin' and what-not,'s just been nothin' but work.  I've mentioned it here before, even ranted a bit in the previous post, and ohhhhh boy.  Despite all that, I've been offered a job there.

Like, seriously: the boss just walked on up, gave me and another worker "The Talk," asked if we wanted to work there, the company willing to even work with both of us if we go back to school.

So yeah, there's that.

Now, here's the thing...beforehand, I probably would've point-blank considered this a no-go, but the thing is...there's these manufactured houses I've been lookin' at that are pretty much 29 grand, and a 12-grand one in Ferndale that's got this humongous corner-style bathtub.  And a job that's willing to work around college hours...I dunno.

I simply don't know.

Honestly it all depends on if the boss in question uses my photos and makes a compelling presentation enough to gets things shaken up over there, 'cuz the way it stands right now I'll accept the job but I certainly won't be settled while I"m there.  If anything I'll only make myself a bigger nuisance, a bigger thorn in day shifts' side, y'knowwhatImean?

At least if the boss gets the trio dealt with, I can accept the job and just move on with my life as normal.  School, modeling, writing, blogging, working.  Finally get a balance in all things.

I mean, it's not much to ask for, is it? it?

Well.  That's all for now.  I continue to plug away at Taboo 2 with the full intention and ability to finish it, if only I can keep up the energy and momentum of a daily pattern that ISN'T going to kill me. D:

We'll see, we'll see.


That Bastard

P.S. - One last thing.  Y'know what annoys me?  Whenever someone hands me a card or points me to a place with, like, ten or twenty different blogs or websites on it, I immediately know A) which one's the main one and B) what the network is like, if it's good and stable or not if it's the kinda bullshit that just leads you to adverts and pop-unders.

So what annoys me?  When I hand my card to someone and they can immediately spot one or two sites that can take you to all nine...and instead choose to ignore 'em all 'cuz it's too hard to go to even one.

I mean I had to hear 'bout this!  Am I honestly the one who gets this kind of thing, I mean there are plenty of others with multiple sites on a card and THEY never get crosstalk about it.

Maybe I'm just fated to be the only guy with multiple sites who gets that kinda talkin', I dunno...I'm not complainin' 'bout it, it's just...I gotta share it with SOMEONE, y'know?

If I can't share it with you guys, who can I share it with?

Except for you.  Yeah, you.  Over there.

I fucking loathe you so very fucking much, you have no idea.

P.P.S. - If you ain't sharin' my blog with yer friends, retweeting mah tweets, or sharing my facebook statuses then why ain't ya?  I've got it plastered all over the place!

Okay, okay, let's do this again:

The Pen Is My Sword (full of poetry, lyrics, novella series The Generalist and my game writing for Extreme Existence: Battleworld)

KAOS: Chaos Party Radio (lol, my "radio" blog featuring video-game review podcasts of The Hooligans)

The Hooligans @ Nerf All The Things! (the things The Hooligans do outside of the show, like modelling, photo shoots, and more~!)

Twitter: @thatbastardfb
Youtube (sound bytes, voice acting, personal podcasts, and more!): /jdwforever
Faecbawks: /thatbastardfrombellingham

Funny story, that's the stuff I've got up on the articles at the unofficial Rage of Bahamut forums, lol...

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